Ladies & Gents, the Diet Spoon.

Exactly how you imagined it would have to be.

bOhv8w8

Screw those silly dietary supplements with their diarrhea-inducing side effects.  At least now I’ll be able to do that trick where I hang a spoon off my nose.

HA! Take that, Diet Spoon.  I see right through you…*

*Terrible joke.

Those Candy Wrapper Jokes Are Getting A Little Intense.

Laffy Taffy has had enough of your shit, and admonishes your laughter.

ZQtdGYr

They’re more interested in hearing your awkward, “heh heh…ohh” sad laughing, as taffy glues your fucking mouth shut, because – how do people eat that shit???

Regardless, I’m pretty sure the first draft of this joke read:

“If a train full of poop and a truck carrying gasoline crashed together, what type of sound would it make?”

“LIFE.”