Leonardo DiCaprio Might Be The Greatest Name in Showbiz.

The title is merely a fact I just made up, but it’s accurate. Take a minute to absorb that sentence.

Moving on. This past weekend was one for the books.

  • Patriots advanced to the AFC Championship game (Bostonian hubby is thrilled, as am I) after a not so stellar start to the season.
  • Niners advanced to the NFC Championship game as they continue to defy the odds on the road and test the pigmentation of my hair.
  • Since I tend to keep myself business when terrified over a game, our apartment has never been cleaner. This is a huge win.
  • Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, once again, were funny and fabulous hosting the Golden Globes. If only they had been featured more.
  • My best friend Miri (you know her as Jennifer Lawrence) won her second Golden Globe at the crusty age of 23.
  • AMY POEHLER WON BEST ACTRESS IN A TELEVISION COMEDY. Then a horse grew a unicorn horn and became a better living thing.
  • Leo DiCaprio won Best Actor in a Comedy/Musical, even though he’s not nominated for anything else in the upcoming awards week, raising his chances at an Oscar nod. This is good for the world.

So many warm and fuzzies!

Speaking of getting warm and fuzzy, let’s revisit one of last night’s best jokes.

KFMnjol

To which Leo basically responded like –

leostrutoriginal

Because not only was it a joke, it was a pretty spot-on fact. Bravo, all around.

What really matters here is this: Leo’s Oscar winning chances have improved! See above picture for reaction.

In related Globes news, Jim Carrey is still fucking hilarious.

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ZINNNNNNNGAH! Thanks for coming, Jim. Really looking forward to some more Harry & Lloyd.

In closing, Lupita Nyong’o might be the most beautiful woman on the planet.

NBC's "71st Annual Golden Globe Awards" - Arrivals

I should really wear more capes.

The San Francisco 49ers Are Playing in the Super Bowl on Sunday & I Might Have a Heart Attack.

You GUYS.

Joy is exploding from me because it’s all really sinking in. The 49ers are in the Super Bowl, and they might win. I hope they win. IWOULDDIE.

But for now, I’m just going to take a moment to litter my blog with the ‘splosions of excitement that are trying to burst out of my every pore.

So a little of this.

And this.

To be fair, I’m not sure what emotions are being displayed here but it doesn’t fucking matter because Ryan Gosling is in a fucking tank top goddammit.

This, too.

This is weird and horrifying, but it’s literally a perfect animation of how I feel right now. Someone gets me out there.

However, if I’m being completely honest with myself, all of the above are totally false (except Ryan, who is always absurdly right) and THIS…this is how I truly feel.

I’m terrified.

But I’m excited.

I’M SO CONFUSED.

It’s a really, really great problem to have, though.

GO NINERS.