And the Oscar Goes To…

I’ll have you know, chivalry is not dead, ladies.

Sometimes, a true gentleman will hold a door open for you, help you pick up your dropped belongings, flash you a sweet smile from across the room, or leave you an endearing note.


This isn’t one of those times. You don’t want Oscar. You want to find somewhere else to park. Forever.

Besides, I never trust anyone who doesn’t put a period at the end of a sentence. If you call that a sentence.


Welp, My Christmas Shopping is Done.

Spoiler alert.

You’re all getting this fucking mug.


Because I’m a fucking vigilante.

P.S.: Of course I found this on Amazon UK. I bet the Brits are sooooooo fucking mad at us.

P.P.S.: So much “fucking” in this post.

Pedos Who Serve The Lord.

Ignorance is the devil’s work, I tell ya.

You really couldn’t have run this by someone?


The tagline is doing you no favors, because:

  1. There should be a comma between “Lord” and “One.” So let’s just get that out of the way.
  2. You didn’t have to capitalize every. single. word. It’s quoted, so write normally.
  3. None of the above even matters because your website reads SWEET TOOTH PEDO.


I just hope the Sweet Tooth Pedo is located next to The Joint chiropractic place in the background there.

This shopping center is turning out to be wildly intriguing. What’s next? Finger Bang, the gynecologist center.